Are you running from or to life?
Join the club if you have to do something to
unwind, relax or shake off the day and—here’s the catch—its gotten unhealthy,
obsessive or out of balance. Find out why and what you can do about it.
Do you need to do something to unwind and relax, to shake
off the day or cope with stress? Here’s the question: Are these things becoming
unhealthy, obsessive or out of balance? If they are, you are eligible to join a
highly inclusive club. It’s called Club Humanity.
If you’re caught up doing things to distress or cope or
unwind, things that are not serving you, you are likely running from life. So,
choose your poison. Whether you move a lot (the “geographic cure”), drink or
use drugs; can’t wait to turn on the TV, watch a movie or open your book; eat
to feel good, really need to have sex, live for the next vacation, or go from
relationship to relationship like Tarzan goes from vine to vine—you may be
already be caught up in a vortex of escapism.
Again, it is a rare person who is not trying to escape. Look
at the obesity epidemic in children and adults. People eat to feel good. And
they find it hard to stop. Again, it’s universal. Whether it’s an elderly black
woman in Uganda, a white teen in the US or a Japanese man in Tokyo, we all try
to escape life.
Why? Because life is really hard. Because we are vulnerable,
sensitive beings who upset each other. Because we hurt ourselves with self-limiting,
self-critical beliefs. Because life will never be as good as we can imagine.
Because we are just self-aware enough to know that we’ve been given a
magnificent miracle called existence, which is going to go away some day.
Even when things are great, some people just can’t enjoy it.
They need to add a beer or wish it was better or worry it won’t last.
Now, I’m not trying to be radical here. Some amount of
escapism is probably fine. The problem is, for the vast majority of us,
escapism becomes a trap. It’s a vicious cycle that propels us dizzyingly
through life more stressed, scared and unhappy than we would have been if we
just turned and faced what we were running from.
What am I talking about when I say, “turn and face what we
are running from”? It amounts to: “Nothing can be changed until it is faced.”
(Thoreau). Live in the moment. Be here, now. (Ram Das) “Radical Acceptance.”
(Tara Brach). “The Power of Now” (Eckhart Tolle). Carpe diem.
These sayings hint at the opposite of escapism: bathing.
Bathing in now. Saturating ourselves in our experience. Immersing ourselves in
our senses, thoughts and feelings. So, why do most people get caught up in
whirlpools of escapism rather than bathing in their experience of life? In other words, why don’t we just “be here
now”?
Well, who wants to bathe in sadness? Who wants to immerse
themselves in boredom? Who would want to purposefully feel anything negative?
Because that is what “being here now” means. Acceptance means embracing
everything just the way it is. So, here’s a key question: Why would we want to
bathe when we can escape?
There are many reasons. One, for example, is that escapism
only works for so long. The underlying problem you’re trying to escape from
usually gets worse. So, escaping doesn’t usually solve problems.
More importantly, bathing in now shows us a higher part of
ourselves that most people aren’t acquainted with. Called many things, like the
“inner you,” a “higher self,” your “true nature,” your soul (in a nonreligious
sense), it lies very deep within your experience. When touched you feel
insanely alive and profoundly grateful for your existence. A source of
exhilaration, energy and deep happiness—it’s there no matter what is happening
around you or within your emotions. Here’s the catch: Touching this deeper core
requires that you completely accept the moment the way it is. You can’t get in
there any other way.
So, while most people around the world desperately seek to
escape from the drudgeries and hardship of life—creating mega empires in food,
alcohol and entertainment industries—some have discovered how to bathe in the
moment. More and more people are figuring out how to luxuriate in their
experience, even when it is harsh. So can you.
How do you do it? It’s a skill. A skill that can be broken
down into subskills. There are lots of ways to learn parts of it, just a few
ways to learn all of it and lots of people who teach it. Start though by asking
yourself: am I running to or from life?
Well, I’ve gotta go. I’ve had hard day and I’m going to fix
some popcorn, get a beer and watch a movie.
For more information on Dr. Skolnick, the SatoriWest Method
or SatoriWest LifeClubs, go to SatoriWest.net.
No comments:
Post a Comment